WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE? ASK A BAAL TESHUVA, AND ASK YOURSELF, TOO.

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OORAH DOES...

That is because Oorah understands that kiruv is a lifetime proposition. It has seen in more than 30 years of kiruv work that there is so much more to the process than providing a Torah education to a child.

“A study was done of day school students who come from non-religious homes,” said an Oorah spokesman. “It showed clearly that the only children who remain frum in later years are those with whom someone is working one-on-one.”

The dramatic part of kiruv is the part that relates to the initial transformation, which can in itself be a long tale of persistence and patience. Children might attend yeshiva or day school for many years without taking on Shabbos observance or kashrus. If their homes do not support those observances, it can be nearly impossible for all but the most adamant children to do it on their own. Much of what Oorah does is to supply the tools for growth during this period. It makes sure children have a way to celebrate Yomim Tovim properly, that they have the opportunity to experience a real Shabbos periodically, and that they have the knowledge, even if they cannot yet use it fully, to live a Jewish life.

Oorah also tries to inspire the parents to grow with their children, knowing that this is the best possible way of solidifying the child’s own commitment. If parents are willing to learn, Oorah will teach them. If they are willing to experience a Shabbos, Oorah will invite them to its Shabbat With Oorah weekend. If they are willing to kasher their kitchens, Oorah will get it done. If they agree to have a sukkah in their back yard, Oorah builds it. Every Sukkos, Chanukah, Purim and Pesach, Oorah sends them a package that enables them to participate in the Yom Tov’s mitzvos.

In short, Oorah does whatever can be done to ensure that the child emerge from his childhood years as a committed, Torah-observant Jew. But then, there’s the rest of the child’s life. He is frum, but he is still a newcomer to a world far different than the one into which he was born and raised. This is difficult enough for those who go through the yeshiva system, yet come from non-religious homes. For those who become religious in high school or college or even later, the issue looms larger.

ACCEPTING THE ROLE

Living a life that is disconnected from the pleasures of a past, secular life, and yet not quite comfortably rooted in the religious world, means that for many baalei teshuva, the life they have chosen is a life of ongoing challenge. Nevertheless, most are happy with their choice and find that the beauty of a Torah life far outweighs the difficulties.

“The truth is, I know I’ll never quite fit in,” says Leah, 54, whose sedate brown sheitel and tasteful skirt and blouse belie a Sixties hippy adolescence. “I know there’s just always going to be a certain separation. When people play Jewish geography with me, I never know anyone. I didn’t go to seminary with anyone and my siblings are not married to anyone my friends know. I have to face the fact that I’ll never have that comfort level that other people have in the frum world.

“So why do we do this? We do it because this is the true way to live and connect to Hashem. It’s not about me and the neighbors, or me and the schools. It’s about me and my family, me and Hashem. This is the right way to raise a family. It’s a beautiful life. For my children, it will be easier.”

Understanding and Respect

“People who become religious deserve a tremendous amount of credit,” says Rabbi Yehoshua Weinstein, Oorah’s Day School Liaison. “When you think of how difficult it is for us FFBs to change one middah, or improve in one mitzvah, it’s hard to imagine how people find the strength to take the entire Torah upon themselves.

“That’s why Oorah dedicates so much effort to follow-up,” he continues. “At every stage in life, there are new challenges for any family to negotiate. Someone who did not grow up frum needs to have people he can turn to for advice and help.

“But – to be honest – there are many problems that would simply not arise if the FFB community were to have a better understanding of the challenges a baal teshuva willingly undertakes.”

Despite all these challenges, both the baal teshuva and the kiruv worker are witnesses to a luminous world of miracles, where the Hand of Hashem seems almost tangible enough to grasp. They never cease to marvel at the stories that have unfolded before them, of eyes opened, souls discovered, lives uplifted and new Jewish homes established.

“I relate to Parshas Lech L’cho,” says Avi, a lawyer from a small Midwestern town. “Hashem told me to leave everything that was familiar to me, and I left. And I founded a family. And I’m named Avraham. To me, it’s still amazing.”